Thursday, August 09, 2007

Nice 'Maters!

Well, the 'mater gods seem to be making up for last year's dump-er crop of inedible, alien-brain turd-balls, because this years crop is fucking insane.

I've got cherry tomatoes coming outta my... cherry tomato-hole -- I'm talking like 10 a day. And they're delicious! You bite into these taut, red juice-balls and you get a tangy mouthful of dewy discharge from Mother Nature's lycopenic loins. After eating a handful, I'm pretty much spent, and have to roll over and take a nap. Good tomatoes.

I've also got some yellow and purple heirlooms that are almost ready for a-pluckin'. I got those plants from the farmer's market, and I'm thinking they're gonna be insane when they're ripe. The tomatoes, not the farmers. The farmers are pretty much insane and ripe every time I walk by them at the market. Real dung-y smellin', with that crazy far-off look in their eyes. Especially them Amish farmers. But, hey, that's the kinda look and smell you want in an Amish farmer, no?

So yeah, tomatoes. I've gotta go now and polish off like 30 more if I'm gonna make a dent in these mofos. And then I've gotta go sleep in the tub. All that acid really does a number on the ol' gazpach-hole.


Shannon said...

Hey, glad you're also getting tons o' tomatoes. I actually had to give some away, we're getting so many. This is not something I would do under normal circumstances, since I very stingy about giving out precious things like books and garden-ripe tomatoes, but these are desperate times.

Anonymous said...

oh god, i am so with you. i went to the farmers market and bought two baskets! what was i thinking? i'm just one person! but they looked so cool...some were all gnarly like those dried apple heads. some looked like sunsets. and the guy selling them was kinda cute
but if i don't eat more fast they're going to rot in my fridge. like everything else. except scotch.