Sunday, August 05, 2007

The Born Lid-flippery...

Well, chalk up another spazztacular year for Mr. Z -- the boy turned the big 0-9 yesterday. Nine fucking years... unbelievable. And it's really only felt like thirteen.

He was very cute yesterday. I heard him wake up around 6:30 and he was nice enough to wait in his room until 8:00, exactly, before he came in and woke us up. I felt like a little bit of a dick 'cuz I forgot to get his birthday cereal, so he could have it for breakfast. We let the spawn pick any really heinous, sugar-y cereal they want for the week of their birthday, and he wanted the cereal made famous by the Count of Chocula. I was too busy wrapping all his loot last night, so he had to go without it this morning. Hey, he's nine now -- time to face the fact that life's a big letdown and your parents are the letdowniest of them all.

He scored with the birthday booty, though. We got him "Mario Party 7" for his Gamecube, this awesomely nerd-tacular game called "Heroscape," which is like the fucking gateway drug to D&D, some Star Wars action figures, and a digital camera. He loved them all, but I think the camera was the biggest hit. He was running around the house, all day, taking close-ups of our noses, pics of Miss O's butt (in pants, mind you), and macro shots of forks and pencils and shit. I was about to tell him to try to think about his shots before taking them, but then I realized that I got him a memory card that stores like 200 pics, so what the shit? Although I did have to stop him when I heard him yell from the bathroom, "Hey, can I take a picture of poop?" Great, now the boy's gonna grow up to be the next Jack Brickhouse.

As usual, the Old Lady baked the shit out of a cake for the occasion. We went with a Dragonology-themed confection, this year:



And, as usual, it was basilisk-cious! Overall, I'd say the day was a success for the lad -- as he was getting ready for bed, he said, "Except for the day I was born, this was my best birthday ever!" And knowing him, he remembers the day he was born. I know I'll never forget it -- shit, with that noggin' of his, it was like watching someone force, I don't know, an extremely oversized baby's head through a much smaller vaginal opening.

But yeah, nine years old -- pretty amazing. The boy is pretty stellar, I must say. He's come a fuck of a long way in that short time and it's kinda blowing my mind that after fifth grade this year, he'll be heading off to Junior High.

Holy shitstain, now I'm depressed. Must eat more dragon cake.

3 comments:

Jon said...

I'll never forget my first dragon cake. :sniff:

Okay, so it was last year. Screw you.

crabbydad said...

Jon, as Jeff VonGundyVendormenden has taught us, it's mighty hard to stop "chasing the dragon... cake."

Perhaps this site might help you get "the cake" off your back: http://www.innervention.com/

Quirkee James said...

Count Chocula is my all time favorite cereal. I'd have been crabby if I was your kid and didn't get it.