Monday, December 17, 2007

Have You Turd the Latest?

I finally took the plunge and bought this incredible hand-held digital audio recorder thing I've had my eye on for, oh, a year or so. I wanted to have something that I could just whip out at a moment's notice to record an argument the spawnage were having, or record Miss O singing in the tub, or record an awesome fart that was just going to go to waste. So much audio gold has slipped through my tingling fingers, I decided I had to buy the fucker. And I was not disappointed. (For those interested in joining the club, find it here.)

Anywhich, Miss O and I have been singing this song from time to time while she sits on the toilet for half-a-fucking-hour trying to dump before bed. It's just kind of this meandering ditty, and we just kind of sing about whatever has gone on that day. I wanted to record it down in the studio (basement) but I didn't want to lose the spontaneity and uncertainty spurred on by the impending poopage.

Enter the Zoom H2!

We recorded it in one take last night during a particularly constipating poo-formance. It's kinda long (the song, not the poo), but I think it's a keeper. I dumped the file onto the mac and then added a little extra noodlin'guitar in the background, but I like the fact that it's raw and un-fucked-with (and a little outta tune).

So, yeah, here you go. I give you "The Toilet Song"! Enjoy...

"The Toilet Song" by the "Miss O Beat."


Kim said...

Sounds like you two had just THRONE that little ditty together! Very call-and-response...I likey!

Miss O has an ethereal voice that lends itself well to bathroom tuneage.

Continued success to the crabby team!

crabbydad said...

I didn't know you liked to LOG on so late, Kim. You must be POOPED at this hour. You do look a bit FLUSHED. Well, URINE for some fun when we finish our next song. It has been FART too long since I posted music up here. All I know is, it sure is fun MAKEing music with these little SQUIRTS.

Oh, look at the time. It's 11 b.m.! I've got to get some shit-eye!

Monica said...

"He's a crab, He's a crab
Oh, the crab is back
Stone cold sober as a matter of fact
He can crab, He can crab
'Cause he's better than you
It's the way that he moves
The things that he do"

I know, a little old school, but hey it's late and I'm just happy you're back. And your front.

Innisanimate said...

When Miss O says 'Lill' after Jill, Gill and Till, I seriously snarfed orange Fanta all over my laptop. Thanks a lot.

bad influence girl said...

I'm glad to see Jill is still hanging around, or whatever pieces of moss doo.

fellow grinnellian said...

Ok - I know this is totally mundane, but if she really has a problem with constipation you should try Benefiber. My son's pediatrician calls it the godsend to pediatric gastroenterology. He's about 25 lb and gets 1/2 tsp mixed into food each day. Smooth, soft poop emerges on daily basis (soon to make it into the potty chair, we hope).

Kim said...

The baby I nanny for has constipation issues. I solved them, and now he's as regular as Big Ben. I mix up this slurry of All-Bran and prune juice (the fiber soaks up the juice and it all turns into a lovely scoopable mess). I stir a few teaspoons of this into his oatmeal every morning and he goes like the energizer bunny.

Aren't you thrilled with where this thread's going?

crabbydad said...

I'm always thrilled when talk turns to poop! I've got poop in my blood!

Hey, maybe that's my problem.

crabbydad said...

And thanks for all the constipootion advice, but I don't want to get her too regular -- then we wouldn't be able to write anymore songs.

(and for the record, F.G., both Miss O and Mr. Z have a nightly glass of Benefiber to grease the works.)

crabbydad said...

And Innis, why the shit were you drinking orange Fanta at 12:33 a.m.?

Innisanimate said...

Orange Fanta is my personal Benefiber. ;)