STICKY: Please vote for my (and Miss O's) song here:
Click this sentence with your mouse-y clicker!
As of 11:21 PM tonight, we're in second place. Not first, mind you, because I don't "do" first place. Or it doesn't "do" me. Nope... me and Bobby Brady... losers. Just like the goddamn ice cream eating contest -- Bobby was fucking chowing down on that bowl and then ol' Porky McSnarferson ends up getting the golden scoop.
Why can't I ever get that golden scoop.
It's the kids today with their loud ukulele music, that's why. No one has time for old men and their calypso songs. Oh well... maybe the crabbyfamily will have a trophy for me at breakfast tomorrow morning: "Honorable Mention Parent."
An old man can dream, can't he?
[a single tear drips from cheek, splashing on a nearby box of adult diapers]